San Diego County Moves Ahead with Medical Marijuana

SAN DIEGO — San Diego county expects to start taking applications for medical marijuana ID Cards on July 6.

San Diego and San Bernardino Counties challenged California's medical marijuana law in court. But last month, the U.S. Supreme Court refused to hear their case.

Now, both counties are moving forward to implement the law spelled out by prop 215. People who use marijuana as medicine must get an ID card from the county to prove they have a right to possess a certain amount of pot.

Thanks, Supremes. :-) When the dust settles, I plan to start growing again.

San Diego County health officer Wilma Wooten says a medical marijuana card will cost $166 for non-Medi-Cal patients. That's if the county board approves that fee structure.

Most likely ifwhen the County Board of S(t)upes approves the fee structure, it'll mean that those folks within the County (outside City limits) who currently have "Medical Use ID Cards" issued by private doctors will have to pay again and re-register with the County. For Medi-Cal members, the fee will likely be "about half" that amount.

Hey, funnygurusdca, where did you go to get your doc-issued Card -- are they taking new referrals? If you could kite me the name of the facility, here or in a private message, I'd be most appreciative. :->

It's absolutely ridiculous the amount of time that's passed since Prop 215, and the amount of money the county has wasted dragging its heels. I've heard some grumblings that the fee is too steep, but it seems to be in line with the fees charged by other California Counties -- a bit more than some, a bit less than others. I should save money overall, because I do plan to start growing again, in accordance with the original intent of 215.

And heck, maybe the County will even get a brighter financial outlook going at some point. That'd be a win-win!

Awesome, awesome.

( See pics )

Do you ever have recurring dreams? If so, are they good dreams or nightmares?

I've never snagged one of those "Writer's Block" thingies before, but this one applies to me! ;->

I've had two recurring dreams throughout my life, though it's been at least a couple years now since I've had either.

The first is a garden-variety anxiety dream. I'm walking up a long, windy staircase from underground. It's all brick, more like a catacombs than a subway. The stairs spiral. As I walk (and walk and walk) I hear someone behind me. When I turn around to look, nobody's there, but I can hear his/her/its footsteps. When I walk faster, they speed up; when I slow down so do they. I get closer to street level and can see light from above. As it nears, the footsteps from behind quicken and I can hear loud, harsh breathing, and that's when the fear sets in. I start to run, and so does he/she/it! The stairs become an escalator, and I'm running in place just to keep up. The Pursuer is so close now I feel his/her/its breath on the back of my neck. At least now it won't be able to hide from me, so I turn around to face it. This is always when I wake up.

The second one is more interesting to me. It began when I was married to my ex-husband, and I had it semi-regularly during the marriage, but it's popped up once in a while since the divorce as well ( though not for a few years now).

It begins with me standing face to face with a huge black dog. Its paws are on my shoulders and its snout is up in my face. It's looking me in the eyes, showing teeth, growling and slavering. The dog is psychically communicating with me, telling me not to move or it will rip my throat out. I sense that I'll be safe as long as I stay still, but every instinct is screaming at me to RUN FOR IT!!! The dog snaps every once in a while, trying to panic me into moving, its saliva sprays my face and its breath steams and its teeth click. All the while, it's telling me psychically Stay perfectly fucking still. Do not move. If you flinch I will rip your throat out. Don't move a millimeter. I fight the panic and stay still. I always wake up while the dog is still "testing" me. It seems like an obvious analysis of this one would have something to do with instinctive vs. disciplined reactions, logic overcoming fear maybe? But I'm not really able to map it directly on to anything in particular that I might need to figure out.

LOL, I never thought of this before right this second -- I wonder if that dog is the one chasing me up the staircase? :D

I'm waiting for 9 a.m. so's I can call the dentist for an appointment. I've been awake since 3, so the waiting is already in full force. It's been a magical year so far, with normalized sleep patterns along with increased energy, more activity, and less spasticity and pain, so it was doubly disheartening to get slammed out of a decent sleep so early, by a freaky facial spasm that turned into a clench and snapped one of my top teeth. :( I do mean snapped too: it's shattered. Not much there to rebuild from. My dentist is an (albeitly odd sort of) artist, though, so if it can be fixed on the cheap in a cosmetically not-unappealing manner, he's the guy for the job.

I cried when it happened, though it didn't really hurt. Emotional tears are a normal enough reaction to a rough night in the midst of a sea of goodstuff, but I was confused by the emotions. The expected: a small jolt of frustration, a bit of fear that one rough night might signal the end of the up times, an icky tinge of self-pity that jumps up occasionally when I get a timely reminder that I do indeed still have M.S. What I wasn't ready for was the over-riding, intense feeling of shame I got smacked by.

I've experienced this before over things that aren't my fault -- childhood aside, it's been physical disability-related stuff, where "fault" isn't even logically an issue, but which are readily understandable even so. Urinary problems, for example -- I'm fortunate enough not to have ever had an accident in public, but it's embarrassing to pee yourself, even in the privacy of your own home, y'know? Somewhat oddly, I felt a sense of shame when my walking deteriorated as well, but that's still simple enough to grasp: Learning to hold our pee and learning to walk are a couple things we, as humans, start being able to do during the transition from infancy to childhood. Those who can't walk or hold their pee are babies, and who wants to be a big stupid baby? Kind of an ingrained, leftover thing that can still provoke a reaction, but which fades quickly when exposed to the light.

I've got some time, so I've been doing some thinking. I suppose the dentist is another transition out of infancy -- we've got teeth so now we should take care of them? We learn to brush our teeth when we're kids, but it's not the same thing. I mean, brushing your teeth is just something you do, not associated in my mind in any way with independence the way that walking is.

The heavy and prolonged use of steroids early in my disease course ruined my teeth. (Early-stage osteoporosis is another "fun" reminder of those days!) Before then, my teeth had been perfectly straight with zero orthodontia, and I was over 30 before I got my first cavity. I never used to have dentist-phobic tendencies, because dentist visits were easy-breezy. I treated my teeth well and they returned the favor. After that jerkoff dentist from a couple years back decided I was a tweaker who had "meth mouth," I've found myself wanting -- no, that's too mild a word, I've felt driven to explain to everyone what the real story on my teeth is. Almost like I'm apologizing for them. To the dentist, no less -- LOL, fixing fucked-up teeth is his job! ;->

Here's where this intersects with another pathway in my fucked-up psyche. ;-> I grew up white trash. Being called that, living the lifestyle. I hated the term when I was young, but thought I'd made my peace with it as an older/wiser person. Even embraced it a little bit -- I ain't a redneck, I'm Whiskey Tango!, that kinda thing. ;-> Partly in fun, partly a serious statement that it's possible for a human being to grow up broke in the neighborhood with no formal education whatsoever, and still be intelligent and know about that-there smart stuff that college grads talk about. Pretty successfully, judging by all the degrees on my F-List (unless, of course, the edumacated types just keep me around to point and laugh at)!

See, I felt like it was Ok to be the thing, but only as long as I defied stereotypes about the thing. White trash chicks are stupid, right? I'm not stupid. They're obese, have big hair and black roots. Nope, nope, and uh-uh. 8 kids with 7 different daddies, food stamps, methamphetamine? None of the above.

Oh yeah -- white trash chicks have bad teeth. Oh.

If U Seek Amy.

That's so damn embarrassing, I got no choice but to make it public, under the "One good way to get over caring too much what other people think is to drunkenly sing 'Let's Get It On' at the top of your lungs out the open front window" theory. Of which I'm a sadly experienced proponent, heh! Stupid pop-psych-o-babble that turns out to be true! Bah!

But I'm smiling now, gap and all, so I guess I learned something good after all. Vita procedit!

Although not enrolled in any courses, I enjoy watching the UCSD Channel fairly regularly. I've stumbled across Wendy Doniger lecturing on the Rg-Veda (and defending her translations thereof) that way. I learned about the basic principles of photovoltaics that way too. Stuff I'm interested in -- and stuff I never knew I was interested in before encountering it on the good ol' UCSD Channel! ;->

Last week I caught a program with Jane Goodall -- the "chimp lady." I searched the UCSD site for transcripts, but unfortunately came up empty -- the channel itself is a marvel, but the associated website occasionally leaves much to be desired. So, good thing I'm not enrolled in any courses, I guess, LOL. While on campus receiving an award, Ms. Goodall was kind enough to stop by for a chat with the UCSD channel mucks, and her interview was the portion of the program I watched.

It was fascinating to me overall, as I was not previously familiar with a lot of her research, or with her personal story, but one anecdote pretty much jumped off the screen at me. Jane Goodall was the first primate researcher to report on the use of tools by chimps -- not simply the "use" either, but the actual creation of tools and assistive devices by chimpanzees. This gave lie to the standard definition of the times, that the use of tools is what differentiates "Man" from the rest of the primates. Ms. G related a story of another "First" in chimp behavior that she observed, decades ago, as a young, fresh, newly-minted primate researcher, among the members of her very first "chimp troop" (troupe? I'm never sure which is proper!).

The members undertook a trip through the jungle, to a waterfall, and arrived -- through design or serendipity -- right at sunset. They lined up and stood there, watching the sun set behind the waterfall. She said that they swayed from foot to foot, making a humming noise, as they watched. When the last rays disappeared, they lined up again and headed home.

While she observed the troop (troupe?) over the years, they repeated this exact behavior, or a semi-regular basis. A couple chimps would head out one day, then the rest would join in, they'd walk down and catch a nice sunset at the 'fall, then head back home en masse.

This is probably one of the trippiest things I've ever heard. She said the way everything just hushed, the "oooo-oooo" humming and swaying, the focus on the sunset and waterfall, there was no word she could use to describe the behavior other than "awe." She believes this is the way that spirituality and religion entered the world, though she admits this is her take and her interpretation.

Still, even if "awe" is downgraded to "sense of aesthetics," it's obviously not pre-programmed, instinctive behavior (unless we grant that primates have an "instinct for beauty," or an "instinct for matters of the spirit" or something).

At this point, the agreed-upon standard of "what differentiates Man from other primates" is that only "Man" has a sense of his own death, or is capable of understanding what that means. I wonder. Ms. Goodall spoke movingly about their reactions to grief and loss. She told of one young chimp she's convinced committed suicide after the death of his mother, in a deliberate, knowledgeable manner that she believes indicated his choice not to continue living without her. Maybe even to "join" her, although even JG admits that might be a little too anthropomorphic.

I haven't found that JG convo online archived anywhere, but did find something about "waterfall displays", also interesting though lacking the emotional impact of JG's anecdotes. I sure do wish there was a transcript available, and if I find one, I'll throw it out there. It's a show that stuck with me, for sure.

I've been away from LJ for a while. Dunno as I'll ever be able to catch up, so I'm pretending we just pushed a giant "Reset" button here. How y'all are? :->

I'm awesome, fantastic, incredible -- just throw some more synonyms in, I'm all of 'em. The whole year thus far has been ... well, it's been magic for me. Also majik and even sometimes magick. I've felt a little guilty here and there, because this seems to be The Year From Hell for many folks I know and care about. It's a matter of degree, though: I've worked extremely hard at times, to get to a place most folks take for granted. I doubt many would want to trade places, so I don't guilt-trip often, or for long. Mostly I just cruise, sail, zip, strut, and otherwise enjoy the holy hell out of this amazing time period.

I saw the doc in February and got a refill on my Zanaflex script. Since then I've taken exactly two pills from the prescription. I use medical cannabis daily, and it's working. I drink coffee daily, and take daily supplements. Those are my current "M.S. medications," and I'm happy with that for as long as I'm able to keep pulling it off.

I've been more active than I've been in, literally, years these past few months. I've been walking up the hill to get the mail every weekday. Sounds simple, right? Well. There is the fact that it's about 1/4 mile up a steep slope, which means I'm getting in about a half mile walk six days a week. Mostly, though, is just that I wasn't able to do it -- not physically able -- for quite some time. This is the 19th year since my diagnosis, and putting it in perspective, yeah, a small victory that I'm still on my feet at all, y'know?

I'm positive that yoga has something to do with it, because it's something I kept at, day after day, year after year, even through long periods when asana was painful and difficult and did not give any noticeable immediate benefits. I've been doing a lot of yoga this year, taking me into a period where asana is never painful or difficult, and the rewards are immediate and most welcome.

Hel turned 40 -- the Big Four Oh!! -- I took him to see the Body Worlds exhibit. It was cool... but not as cool as it looked like it should oughta be. The plastination process they use causes some shrinkage, and the bodies tended to look really fake (even though they were actual human cadavers). The posed bodies were the most visually interesting part, I thought, and they came toward the end. The ice skating couple, the yoga lady (of course!) and the sk8boarder dude were my favorites. :->

Tam graduates in less than a month now, and I'm excited on her behalf. Nervous too! She's graduating with a student debt burden of Zero (yup, that's a Big Circle with no numbers ahead of it), which seemed really great, BUT I started thinking, watching reports of joblessness on the news, that it actually might have been smarter to keep going to school for a few more years, bag that doctorate -- surely, the economy will have improved by then? (Of course, I expect it to improve and worsen several times over the course of a couple, three years -- so who knows?) But now it's looking like she might have a job very soon, and a decent one at that, teaching -- we're thinking the very best of good thoughts for her on that one. I'm hoping it might be the beginning of her very own Special Relationship with the Universe, LOL. Hey, my pal the Uni has done mighty fine by me, y'know! :D

We're buying a truck, and then we're getting a dog. Everything in my life is good right now. I haven't got a single complaint, and I've got plenty to celebrate. It's all yoga, and I'm a yogini. It's all lila and I'm a playa! :D (The siddhis get a bad rap; it's both supremely spiritual and sublimely practical to be able to control one's own neurochemical responses without need for outside substances.)

I'm all the way plugged in. And I like it.

It's been cold. We had a couple smallish storms with wind and rain; sun is out now but it's still freezing. My rocks survived the first round, and I was looking at them, running this whole thing about how my rocks are balanced, same way my life is balanced: a little off kilter, occasionally skew-wise, but standing tall, right? Then the second round of gusts'n'gales arrived, and my rocks are now scattered all over the yard. LMAO, I love it! See what happens when ya get a little too self-important? :D

I've been having problems with spasticity more than usual in the cold weather, so I do a lot of asana and hit the medical device (qua bong) earlier in the day than my usual habit. I get this kind of bone/joint ache when it's cold, but increased spasticity confused me. Hel suggested it might be as simple as, when it's cold I tense up, wrapping my arms around myself and huddling. He suggested I run the heater, which I occasionally resort to. ;-> I've also been practicing noting what I do when I'm cold, and consciously trying to "relax into" the shivers, and dude! It's pretty surprising how well that seems to be working!

Is this one of those things everyone except me already knows, and I'm late to the party? I really like simple fixes. :->

I saw the doc last week. This year it'll be 7 years since I've had any hardcore treatments, which means I could have them again if I wanted. He said he'd be willing to recommend me for the TOUCH program if I wanted to give Tysabri a try. He would also be willing to let me pick back up with Novantrone should I want to resume.

Tysabri isn't approved for SPMS and has a frightening possible side effect, but that's not my biggest issue. It just seems like so much hassle to go through. If I had an aggressive relapsing-remitting case, Tysabri would interest me, but at this point I'm not sure. I've had Novantrone before and it wasn't as bad as everyone fears it will be -- but it wasn't fun either. But I've had it before and benefitted from it. It's a known quantity, while Tysabri would be a whole new bag.

I've got some thinking to do. Nothing at all at this point is definitely included in the options.

Anecdotal evidence is not "scientific" in the sense that it's been subjected to double-blinded placebo-controlled large multi-center trials and "proven" in a lab. Sometimes it's still convincing; other times decidedly not.

"I took Substance X and I felt great!" is an example, generally not convincing to me.

In the later months of last year, I started taking CoQ10 because I'd heard from several folks that they took it, and felt great -- and because there's some evidence that it can help with the oxidative damage leading to cellular death in the Secondary Progressive stage of M.S. Some slight evidence, but what the hell, right?

So I started regular supplementation, and I felt great. Amazing! More energy than I could remember having in years, and my sleep cycles began normalizing. Then other things started to go south: increased stumbling, lack of coordination, other symptoms kicking up here and there.

Saw the doctor. He said the disease was showing some renewed activity. He told me to cease the supplementation...and the disease activity backed off again. So did the increased energy, mental acuity, and generally "awesome!" feeling.

I've now backed my way back into supplementation by taking (under the doc's care) smaller-than-usual amounts over time to get the ol' bod used to it, and have inched my way back up, feeling energized and awake again, while the disease remains stable. I've got one more step up to "therapeutic" dose, though I get a few symptom flares here and there, the extra energy and connectedness I get in trade are totally, definitely worth it.

Here's the thing, though. This stuff is supposed to ramp up one's immune system. Folks with M.S. have over-active immune systems (that's overly simplistic, but valid), so there's a concern there.

However! It seems to me that folks who want to strengthen their immune systems have got a perfect way to do so. This stuff WORKS! Not enough to have large, multi-center, double-blinded, placebo-controlled study evidence for its use, but enough to have an M.S.-specialist neurologist yank patients off due to its immune strengthening effects.

If it's effective enough to jump-start disease activity, then it definitely anecdotally seems as though it'd be effective enough to jump-start immune system activity in an otherwise healthy person.

Anecdote from me: CoQ10 really works on that immunity. If you don't have medical concerns about heightening your immune system, then get some and take it regularly. Because, for that particular system, the stuff WORKS! :-)

I'm not floating anymore. ;->

I'm actually finally getting this, I think.

The increased energy, lessened pain, and feeling of being "on" when awake lasted all the way through the end of '08 and carried me well into the New Year. It went away a couple days ago. I'm back to crawling and spider-walking and tightroping between spasticity controlled enough so I can bend my leg, and controlled to the point where the leg is limp and useless.

It's happened similarly before; it's kind of an ongoing thing. What's different this time?

Instead of landing with a thud and a crash and fighting through depression, I'm feeling plain grateful. One of my goals has been to be able to relish the up times and shrug off the down. Because I know the good times won't last forever, and need to be able to face the realities of my own sitch. If I can't handle the fact that I have progressive M.S. and the prognosis is continued steady (but slow!) decline of physical abilities, and to see the little bright spots as oases to rest up, refuel and get back to the march through the desert -- then I'm not really living my life, I'm turning away from it.

This is my reality. So are the extended periods of samadhi. Along with anger, frustration, grief, sorrow, joy, bliss, etc. etc. etc. It's all here, all of it.

I've learned that I don't find that state of mind by posting about it, or talking about it, or meditating on it. I learn it by doing it. Just staying right here and walking the walk -- so to speak! ;-> Karma yoga is the union of one's self with one's actions. That's what I'm practicing right now.

And I can do it. I'm down with the realities of my own situation. It's worth what it costs -- it's worth everything. Life is beautiful. It's even more beautiful to realize that before it's too late.

Oh, I do hope it's a wonderful day for you! :D

xoxoxo